Back at it, again!

Hello! 

Growing through this adolescense stage of my life, there are three realizations that I eventually learn:

1. To deal with SOLITUDE most of the time. True that nothing's constant in this world except change not your high school bestfriend nor your college super buddy. We don't have this constant someone to be with all the time unless of course when you have already met your partner in life. In my case, I am still waiting not searching. Yes, I know what you're thinking, I have entertained the idea of settling down too thus I don't hold any control of it, so, I'm handing it to the Most Authorized person to take charge of it. Cross the bridge when you get there, maybe. Everybody gets busy, everyone's also trying to fill the box that awaits them while I am making my own too. So, as I was saying, I have so much of solitude. There are times that I want to yell out loud because I can't no longer handle things alone. But, that is reality, even in death, you are alone. So, deal with it then. 

2. The higher your position in life, the bigger your responsibilities. Life's moving. Long before, my worries were about getting good grades and the likes. Hence, today, my life is not limited only to my family and friends but to the extent of my country, politics, humanity and everything in between. They all have become my concerns. Since I started working, involvement at many things begin too. Even if you don't like to go out of your comfort zone, circumstances are pushing you to. There were lots of desperate experience I didn't saw coming. But, glory be to Him, He never left me alone with my everyday battle. I complaint a lot of times though, but at the end of the day, it's only prayers I needed. That is why we have to geared ourselves with so much prayers. Indeed, He will never decree a thing that is beyond your capacity. And yet, sometimes it made me wonder, He must be thinking I'm a superwoman to face such hard things. Haha. Kidding aside. 

3. The way you see things before will no longer be the same today. I must say I have changed a lot including my perceptions. What you are today is a result of the past, a perpetual shaping of one's experiences. With the kind of environment and workplace I have now, most of the people I am engaged with are older than me, mostly are parents and grands. So, most of my insights were affected by the wisdom of them people. I felt like I think old too at times. Or in other words, life isn't just about play or having good times, you have to go with it seriously. Perhaps, that is the essence of growing is all about. So, be it. 

Random Musings

I've been longing to blog about my whereabouts the past few months, however, I don't know where to start whether from sharing you my 'Towards Peace' experience or from unleashing the artistic side of me through Calligraphy. Had I known there's still chance for me to do arts in a very least way. Well, at least, at this point of time I am assured that both sides of my brain are functioning. (Laughs) 

Or perhaps, I should share you our touching lives stories that directed me towards becoming an RC member or 'Bati'. Or, should I tell you how I've gone so far that I lost track of time. Imagine, BER months are already approaching. Allahu Akbar! I've got a lot to tell, nonetheless, who cares anyway??

Honestly speaking, behind all those wondrous events of my life, I'm feeling lost at times, easily get distracted, out of focus, mostly pre-occupied. I don't know why. And yet, there were times at work that I become so dull because I don't know which to do first. Maybe, multi-tasking is so unhealthy. Ugh. I badly need self-therapy. (Sighs)

Anyhow, going back to which to share, I might instead express my prayers for everyone because aside from my life isn't so interesting to brag about, prayers is the only best thing you can offer to those people near to you so is with those far from you. As cliche goes, it can change a lot of things including pre-destined situations. It has the power to transform your agony into a joyous feeling if only then you believe. Thus, Allah, glorified is He in whose Hand is the dominion of all things. 

To start with, I ask for that may He grant us goodness in both worlds. I seek refuge against all the worldly yearning of ourselves and all the evil acts that can possibly be done without us knowing. May He guide us always in His straight path. May He remove us in our hearts all the things that He displease. May He grant us beautiful patience and strength to face all the bewildered trials He may inflict upon us. May He fortify the Muslim Ummah against the filthy whims of the disbelievers. And above all, may He grant us all Jannatul Firdaus. Allahumma Ameen.

All the love in the world. Alhamdulillah.

Happy First, Annadear!

Last year of the same day, I signed my appointment as a permanent employee (not to mention the position) of one of those prestigious hospitals in my hometown, Amai Pakpak Medical Center. So, today, marks my first year of service rendered. How time flies, ha! Subhanallah. :-)

Well, never did it cross my mind that I would be exercising my profession here after teaching because whenever I heard the word 'hospital', first things come in my mind were doctors and nurses in white apparels or perhaps people whom deal with curing lives. As a matter of fact, when someone introduced me APMC, I reacted like 'Huh? Anong gagawin ko don?'. Never did it come to my senses that a hospital needs also an accountant for their financial accountability and whatever finance related aspect it may contribute. So, there I met APMC, I met random people of different professions such as doctors, nurses, social workers, and etc. And of course, the BIG BOSS, the obsessive compulsory slash humpy grumpy slash workaholic slash what he wants you follow slash huhubels type. HAHAHAHA. Sssssshhhhh.

When you are new to a certain institution, first thing in your mind to do is to impress your boss, right? You have to give your best shot just to catch your boss' attention and appreciation. I think that's what i've been trying to do the past year. I guess, it worked. If you may know, year 2014 was grounded on my career. I spent overtimes. Most of my weekends were spent in the office just to finish overdue backlogs. Transitory period as it was. I've struggled a lot as expected. But, I've learnt a lot too as well. I've discovered things about myself that I thought I can't do before. I have been versatile as how they would describe me in the office. I never thought I would have surpassed last year with a very strong will. And I remained patient and humble. Alhamdulillah.

However, while being busy at work, I've got exposures too with seminars and trainings. One of government employee perks is to travel with teneneneeeen, free allowance. Haha. I have learnt traveling alone and deal with unknown people because I really am a anti-social person. Good thing, I have come to beat it from time to time. As per travel's experience concerned, I've been to Ilo-ilo, Cebu, Manila, and Clark, Pampanga last year. And I'm looking forward for more travels this year onwards. Teheee.

Thus, It feels surreal and glorious how I've gone so far and I am forever grateful for what I have become now. I love my work inspite of its lethal tasks it imposed upon me. Aside from its convenience since it's a few distance away from home, I am near with my loved ones, I could extend help to the people I know or even strangers in little ways I can and most importantly, I'm earning a halal income. Indeed, what is made halal for you is good for you because I can really feel the barakah of it. May Allah never ever let me engage with something has to do with bribe or whatelse isn't permissible. May He grant us profession that would be meant for His deen only. in shaa Allah. :-)

Above all, Glory be to God whose in control of everything. Ü

(Disclaimer: This post has been remained to my drafts since 18th of February. And yet, I'm greeting myself again a HAPPY FIRST YEAR OF BEING A GOVERNMENT EMPLOYEE. More power and Godspeed!) 

How can love be the reason of most sorrows when if you have to define the word itself, it never intents to. Love doesn't mean to hurt, it's people doesn't seem to know how to handle it, so, it ended up hurting themselves. Love isn't blind, we only chose to see the good in every aspect of it and wouldn't mind the bad. But, it isn't supposed to be so. Moreover, love isn't selfish, we just want to hold the best of it that it turned out us to be solipsistic. Hence, if you want to put LOVE in its right perspective, it is more than just a feeling or a strong affection, it is beyond romance. Love should be a tool to improve you, as it makes you fonder, it should better you. Love is the most positive form of feeling, almost equates to happiness when you are taking it aright. Sadly, ironic it is, nowadays, people can't attest to its deepest meaning. 

Enero be like - Happy De-stressors.

As I was browsing my gallery and instagram, I noticed that I have several dates (that usual kain sa labas) with friends last month. Perhaps, first month of the year has been tougher on me - FS, backlogs, deadlines, insert anything work-related here. Therefore, you'll know I'm stressed when I call a friend/s for a de-stressing occassion because good food and a good conversation, other than work, with someone is for me a good diversion. Thus, it's my way of keeping things in balance from work to socials. Isn't it cool that amidst your deadly work duties you're having a good time too? It's just about timing, dear. Don't let yourself get stuck at work, sometimes, it's good to be lost in a moment for a while. :')

While January is at its toughest, I'm sure I did a blast with them awesome people:

01.03.15 -  Because we're craving for Bloopers Milktea and later did we know it was closed and we have to moved to another place, Revastenu instead. After then, we walk around the Oval just what we used to do. Unwinding before everything gets back to work and yet kami lang available. Hohoho. For all y'know, Jam is a highschool friend. She's the most free whenever I invite for a date. :">

01.14.15 - I went to CDO to attend our DOH Operation Plan for 2015 in Pearlmont Inn. And since we're done earlier than expected, I met Karts before leaving home. Karts is the one I'm texting for company whenever I went to CDO because she's having her review classes there. And there, we tried the newly opened BonChon in Centrio.

01.24.15 - Annadear x Amy x Binx x  Myles x Ate Pawe x Ate Sal 

Finally, the professionals met again after nth months but still incomplete. Firstly, I initiated this since it's weekend and  I'm done with my year-end FS, I have reason to celebrate. So, originally, I texted them ladies (amy, binx and myles) to meet over a milktea date, and had I known the two auditors were here too. So, I am more than glad they're coming. However, there was a change of plans, instead of a milktea date, it turned out to be a fine dining at My Tiny Cakeshop sponsored by Amy and then milktea afterwards treat by yours truly. 

Good thing, Ate Sal bring her car and we can joyride however we want. So, we went to MSU after in pursuit of that Bloopers milktea and yet again it's closed. It rained hard, so, we ended up trying the Ritch Cafe, new bistro in ComCent. Hence, we can't stay longer because Myles had to rush back to AKIC to give special exam for her students. We decided to accompany her and eat foods inside the car instead. Guess, what happened? Her students went home because she's an hour late already (blame on us. Wuhahaha) and have to postponed the exam. Bawi-bawi na lang next time. Hahaha

Oh well, lots of things have changed, I must say. But, I'm more than happy that we're all growing on our chosen career. :)))

01.28.15 - At a very very long last, the overdue milktea craving is over. Thanks to Jam whom invited us Rairai for this. After milktea sucking, we transfer to another place to eat finger foods. Hashtag busaw much. Lols. Yong feeling na hindi ka makahinga pero hindi ka naman busog, hahahahaha But, Alhamdulillah still. Oops! Something had happened that day too, I saw someone unexpectedly. Thanks to a sick friend whom made us crossed our eyes again. Choooooss!! Indeed, if Allah permits it, He does make it happen. 

 01.31.15 - (Lanmar, Ate Naj and Ate Ani) Because the month's about to end, and Feb-ibig is coming, what about mingling with new faces? Meet my new friends from work and at the same time my co-volunteers for the upcoming event of Mufti Menk this last week of February. I am excited about the event so am I being with this people. May Allah continue to bless me with friends that leads me closer to His deen. Alhamdulillahi Masha Allah!! *.*

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I'm loving how my 2015 so far is going and again I'm claiming for an abundant year. May Allah pour us His divine Mercy and provide us the best of both worlds. In shaa Allah. Happy lang walang ending. ",)

Reliving.

Guess who's back?? I have kept this blog in private and mute for two years already. Good thing, my not-so-poor memory never failed in remembering passwords and emails. I felt nostalgic after rereading everything were written in this page and I realized I want to relive this account again. I'd prefer keeping memories here instead on my tumblr account. However, I might be using that account too because that was my memory bank for the past two years. And here I am, moving again. Hashtag changing mind here. Meanwhile, it's nice to be back and I'll be very glad to share you tidbits of my life. ^^